Sometimes, I sit and ponder who I really am and how do I want to be known. It’s not that I don’t like me as I am, It’s only that I worry about how I’m perceived. You say why worry. I say why not.
Idiomatically speaking, I am an “old comfortable shoe”. People have grown to expect a sameness about me that is good for self-esteem, but not so good for my adventurous soul. Where to? How long? Why? I need to see some of this strange, wonderful world.
A to Z, there are so many ways to describe me. I want to be known as..............
Am I really able, alert and attentive? I am not always alert to things around me because I am not as attentive as I should be. I am able to realize these things about myself.
Can I really be blessed, bashful and beautiful? Of course I am aware of my beauty and certainly feel blessed for it. But I am also bashful at the recognition of my features.
Have I actually presented a picture of myself as being creative, conservative, and capable? I’m certainly creative in my own mind. I have a conservative attitude with my own money and hopefully capable of controlling it. But, am far too critical with myself.
Does being daring, defensive and doubtful fit together for one person? Of this I am doubtful and daring anyone to try and break my defensive position on it.
I ask if I am earnest and efficient. But being an enthusiastic person, I tend to demand that my efficiency be recognized and appreciated in an earnest manner by those that know me. After all, I want to be known as......................
Have you ever wondered if I am a foolish person? Am I a fearless one? Being often frightened by the unknowns in the future, I am certainly not fearless. I am faithful to my God, my family and to myself, thus I don’t think I will be known as .......foolish.
When I am confused about how things should be, I can be grumpy. I want things to be a certain way. I don’t want to be known as grumpy. I am grateful for all of those things that have been given me in the past; those are the things that make me a glorious person. But there is also a greed in me that makes me want to excel and “take the bull by the horns” Will I be known as.........glorious?
I have heard it said that being happy is a state of mind and only for the instant of gratification; I don’t know about that. I do know that being a helpful person makes me happy and for more than a passing moment. So, being a helpful happy person will certainly make me healthy both in mind and body. But I don’t want to be known as healthy! That is so passe.
I am hoping that I will become an independent person who can use my own skills and abilities to make me inquisitive enough to want to know “what is over the next hill”. Who knows? Will I use these things that I learn to be a more complete member of the human race? Or will I always feel incomplete? I don’t want to be know as indecisive.
I also know that I want to use my joyful nature to justify my jealous feelings toward my friends. I languish in the friendship of those that I feel comfortable with, those that I can open up to, those that I can talk freely with and add some jubilation to my being. Maybe I like being known as............jubilant.
Being a kind person makes those you have contact with feel good about themselves. I want to be know as ............kind.
There are things within a person that makes them loving and capable to give as well as receive those feelings. Yes, loving is good. Will I be known as a lazy person because of my slow methodical way of accomplishing the end result? Maybe to some. Oh, and I like to laugh-at those things that really give my body and mind a tickle. Of course, I will be know as.............
Often I have been accused of being moody. Yes I do have my moments when the mood swings from here to there without definite provocation. I am moody. There, I said it. Does everyone need to be motivated? I don’t know how to harness motivation well enough to turn it into the drive I need for success. But I am willing to learn. I suppose if I “keep my nose to the grindstone” everything will “come up roses” in my garden of life!
Can being nosey help me get better things from my work, my relationships, my whole life? Sure. As a result, I am somewhat nonchalant about being nosey. I listen, assimilate and learn. I am not nervous about that. Do I want to be known as.............nosey?
Are my habits so obvious that this is how I will be known? Yes I am obvious in most things that I do, but I can also be obscure with hidden desires and plans that will make me more motivated. I am orderly enough to keep the obvious separated from the obscure. Maybe I will be known as.................orderly!
You know that being a poised person and always sure of your next move will make you purposeful in your endeavors. Pure. Yes I value purity of heart, mind and body. I am a passionate person when it comes to my “old fashioned values”. Stay poised but be polite in dealing with others. Yes of course, I want to be known as....................polite.
Queenly. Now there is a trait that will show you how “to win friends and influence enemies”. I’m told that my regal presentation about my house gives the impression of being queenly. That’s not a bad thing. I feel good with it. Quiet. Yes sometimes, too quiet. I have a mind of my own but how to speak it in certain instances makes my tongue feel numb and useless. I’m too quiet at times. It’s not so bad being known as...........quiet.
Can one be religious, righteous and rambunctious at the same time? I certainly have had a good religious background that gives me the feeling of being righteous. All things considered, I like the inner peace of righteousness. The calm that it gives me when I want to reflect or look ahead. But one must also have some fun with life and being rambunctious at times gives me the satisfaction of doing “something out of the ordinary”. I probably want to be know as.....................
There are those that tell me I am a smart person. I have book knowledge but also am able to use my brain and stimulate my common sense. Smart is good. I also possess the inherent quality of being shy. Maybe I can turn being shy into being coy, now that would be better. Being coy would make me smile. “Smile and make others wonder what you are thinking”. Sure, I want to be known as...........smiling.
For those that are truthful there is a feeling of relief in that you don’t have to remember any of the lies. That is important to me! To be as truthful as one can makes others see them as trustworthy. I like that feeling. But to round out the person, I will also need to be tolerant. Be tolerant of those who cannot or will not be truthful and trustworthy. I like tolerance. I want to be know as.............tolerant.
To be useful is to be giving of yourself, your time and your knowledge. Being useful at the workplace will get recognition of a job well done. Being useful with family and friends will earn you respect as a person. I like that. An unusual person is one that takes normal everyday things and weaves them into something different. I think I am unusual in my approach to daily routine. Being unusual will give the mind a mental workout to fling off the stale mundane cobwebs of trivial thoughts. But, I want to be known as.....................useful.
I am not a vociferous person although I like to speak my mind and give my opinion. I want to feel valued. Being valued for your thoughts can be good if you keep the thoughts on track and don’t belittle or bewilder your peers. To be vehement is not a good trait. Surely I will be known as...............
A wasteful person is one that I try to steer clear of, they bring too much chaos into your life. Me, I like to try and make valuable use of my time, energy and resources. “Waste not want not”. That’s me! Do you think being wishful is wasteful? I don’t. I like to feel like I am a wishful person. I want to be known as wishful because it does give me purpose and direction. I have a feeling that being wishful can make me wise; I think that. Sure I want to be know as..........wishful.
Letter X is much too difficult to deal with. I always think that x will make me a has been or one that is no longer valuable to the circumstances. Ex-president, ex-mayor, ex-student or whatever used to be. I don’t want to be known as anything with an X, unless, of course, it is eXpert. I want to be known as here, now, in the present.
Conventional wisdom tells us that being youthful doesn’t gain us a lot of respect. People tend to equate youthfulness with an uncaring and negligent attitude. Not me. I want to ride the horse of youthfulness all the way into maturity. “So yesterday”, what a loss of future. Let me yearn for what is about to be and not what was. Do I really want to be known as.....................
Trying to put myself through the rigors of the alphabet has really zonked my thought process.
Somewhere between a and z is what I want to be known as. Maybe not, maybe I can just move along with being known as..............Anne Thea A. Sode! That is so me! I can’t change perceptions.
